America's 'Cookie'

"I want my twelve Cookie!  This was demanded from Cuba Gooding in the movie Men of Honor.  This non-fictional movie is about Carl Brashear, the first amputee in U.S. Navy history to return to full active duty and became the first African-American to become a Master Diver. After Carl had his leg amputated, he had to prove he could take twelve steps while wearing a 290-pound U.S. Navy diver's diving suit before he could be re-instated to full active duty.  Indeed, this requirement was racially motivated to guarantee his failure.  In addition to pure determination of courage and absolute resolve of being the best of what he wants to be; Master Chief Sunday's (character play by Robert De Niro) encouraging and demanding words ... "I want my twelve Cookie!”  Carl does indeed take all twelve steps resulting in his being re-instated to full active duty.  Master Chief Sunday gave him the nickname 'Cookie' because during their service together on the USS Hoist, the Chief remembered Carl as nothing more than a Navy cook.

On November 6, 2012, the 'Cookies' of Florida and all around these United States endured almost insurmountable oppression.  It was this same type of pure determination of courage that propelled record number of African-Americans and minorities to stand in line four, five, six and more hours to cast their vote.  They refused to be denied what many have long since paid with their lives to ensure.  

It is truly at these times that I am most proud to be an American.    

Gotta have it!

Twelve years ago, my life changed after being stalked by a man who later became my husband. Well, stalking is the word his co-worker used.

I noticed my husband for the first time in the cafeteria of the federal building (we both were employed there). A co-worker and I were chatting over breakfast about my pending divorce, and I looked up to what appeared to be a happily smiling guy.

He walked over and introduced himself. After some small talked, we discovered we were both in the final stages of our divorces.  He indicated he was casually dating and said one lady was quite a bit younger than he (I'm a year older than he, which means she is quite a bit younger than I). I jokingly said to him, whoever she is, she is going to wish that she looked half as good as I do when she is my age. Oh yes!  This remark got a reaction.

After that first encounter, he would mysteriously pop up at breakfast the exact same time as I (hint: the stalking).

What eventually sealed the deal?  It was the last day of The Texas State Fair; I stopped by his office to agree to him taking me. However, it was a Friday and his co-worker stated he was gone for the weekend. I decided to leave a note simply stating that I stopped by and was going to say yes to the fair. I signed the note Shelia and prepared to be off of work until the middle of the next week to celebrate my birthday.

I later found out that upon his return to work on Monday, he began a woman-hunt in hopes of tracking me down after receiving my note. He did not know my last name, my telephone number or the floor that I worked on. However, he did know the federal agency that I worked for and proceeded to the Human Resource Department.  Mission:  Retrieve my last name and telephone number. Equipped with only my first name and a description of me, he pleaded with the staff that he HAD to locate this girl,and he was eventually able to obtain my information. 

Surprise! Surprise!  That is what I felt when I returned to work and retrieved his voice message. I phoned him and got the entire rundown of how he obtained my telephone number. I later agreed to lunch and as the saying goes, the rest is history.

For our 12th anniversary (August 4th), we took a drive down to the Houston/Galveston area. We had an incredible stay at the Four Seasons and enjoyed the Galveston area.  

  A few photos:

 Gene loves him some Shipley's Donuts.  They are so popular in Houston that they are open 24 hours.

 The Four Seasons in Houston was fabulous.

We were silly willy at the Forrest Gump restaurant on Galveston Island.

 We had a lovely dinner at a local restaurant in Houston.

 We thought we would kick up heels a little downtown Houston.

And, Along came the "HELP"!

Back in the Saddle - Divaliciousness!

So, what have I been doing?  I celebrated my 12th wedding anniversary. I vacationed in Atlanta and visited with both a high school and college friend. I hadn’t seen my high school best friend in at least 20 years. I attended various training classes for my job and met interesting people. I went home to Mississippi to tailgate with high school classmates that I hadn’t seen in years. I visited Angolo Prison with my father and stepmother. All signs point to having lost a friendship. I had a car accident in which my car was totaled. I recently had an early 47th birthday celebration. I owned a truth that I had previously been unable to. Today, October 24, is my birthday and I wanted to start sharing again.  I humbly thank all who have expressed their admiration for the blog and graciously asked that I continue.

I vividly remember celebrating my 46th birthday last year with a few couple friends for brunch.  Wow! What difference a year can make.  What I know for sure is that life is about growth. If you aren't moving forward, you are not making the right decisions. At this time in my life, I'm more in tune to my growth and more importantly my complacently. 

I'm anxious to share my experiences over the past couple of months.  Unfortunately, It would be both Impossible and ineffective to express in one posting.   Since I'm a nontraditional kind of girl, I'll start backwards.  Most people celebrate milestones, I'm not most people.  I celebrated my 47th birthday - Divalicious- style.  


OOOOH-AWWWH!

The Storm Is Over Now?

The most desolate recognition following the triumphant dissolution of a life's problem is the acknowledgement that another is surely brewing. Whether it be the always popular martial woes, unwelcoming health diagnosis, friendships gone to the dogs, family standoffs or the numerous other unpleasant pains in the lower extremities; life's endless supply of chaotic endeavors are ever lurking over the horizon to damper one's spirit.

The key to this dilemma is soaking up, basking in and wallowing in life's happy moments in the moment. Not allowing tomorrow's uncertainties steal joys of today is one of life's HAPPY secrets.

One of my favorite things to do when melancholy is boogie my way back to happy times through music. Pick your favorite genre(s) to serenade your blues away. Remarkable, incredible and indescribable breathtaking moments are bending the curve. Hold tight, hug the curb, your magnificence awaits you.

May I suggest the following to get your party started:

Temptations:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-es4Q8AJaU&list=AL94UKMTqg-9CwnHTGslCsF82SxV0QZheH&index=3&feature=plcp

Al Green:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l73FkH3v7yg&feature=related

Tina Turner:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJGoNeM3WzY

 Diana Ross and The Supremes:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXGz8i0I2L0

The Manhattans:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tj96QFzOL5Y&feature=related http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pHhItkhc7o

Gladys Knight:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pHhItkhc7o

Hate On Me!

"Every time you are tempted to react in the same old ways, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future."

-Deepak Chopra

This quote elicited nostalgic feeling of my young adult self; a blatant reminder of confident deficiency and conformity.

It is times like this that I'm beholden to the significance of time; wisdom that time bestows and lessons learned.  Time's best reward affords the uncompromising lack of desire to people please.

Somewhere along life's journey, I've relinquished the desire to relish unsolicited opinions and critiques.

At the very least, I'm no longer allowing the stench to linger.  Stench immunity propels one to self-power.  Thereby, one is bestowed a measure of fearlessness, knowing that you are beneath no one.

Be careful that the prison that find yourself in, isn't the one that you put yourself in.  How unfortunate to have lived in  confinement, when you were the key holder?  We are truly sometimes our own worst enemy.

May the freedom from others' self-imposed values bequeath your own portion of fearlessness.  Simply, unlock the door and walk into your own authenticity.

"Hate On Me" by Jill Scott is an absolute favorite of mines -  my ringtone. 

 Lyrics to Hate On Me:

If I could give you the world on a silver platter
Would it even matter? You'd still be mad at me
If I could find in all this a dozen roses
Which I would give to you, you'd still be miserable

In reality I'm gon' be who I be and I don't feel no faults
For all the lies that you bought
You can try as you may, break me down when I say
That it ain't up to you, gonna do what you do

Hate on me, hater, now or later
'Cause I'm gonna do me, you'll be made, baby
Go 'head and hate on me, hater, I'm not afraid of
What I got I paid for, you can hate on me

Ooh, if I gave you peaches outta my own garden
And I made you a peach pie, would you slap me out?
Wonder if I gave you diamonds out of my own womb
Would you feel the love in that or ask why not the moon?

If I gave you sanity for the whole of humanity
Handed all the solutions for the pain and pollution
No matter where I live, despite the things I give
You'll always be this way, so go 'head and

Hate on me, hater, now or later
'Cause I'm gonna do me, you'll be made, baby
Go 'head and hate on me, hater, I'm not afraid of
What I got I paid for, you can hate on me

You cannot hate on me 'cause my mind is free
Feel my destiny, so shall it be
You cannot hate on me 'cause my mind is free
Feel my destiny, so shall it be

Hate on me, hater, now or later
'Cause I'm gonna do me, you'll be made, baby
Go 'head and hate on me, hater, I'm not afraid of
What I got I paid for, you can hate on me

The Old and The New

Life is sure to throw us all a few curve balls as we journey along our authentic paths.  I'm reminded of countless wondrous excursions journeyed through this thing call life. The joy of friendship has been steadfast throughout my years.  Life has taught me that beauty comes and goes, but quality time with friends is always in style.  At Girls Night Out, I find that you simply- just get to be a girl. 

One of my favorite books on friendship is "Of Mice and Men", written by Nobel prize-winning author John Steinbeck.

A favorite friendships song: Footprints In The Sand by Leona Lewis.

I encourage you to embrace both of them and hope that you find them just as endearing as I have.

I wish for you the ultimate joy of splendorous friendships - both old and new.

Hanging out with friends at IPIC Theatre- Fairview, TX 

Bunco with new diva girls

 

Bunco with new diva girls

Footprints In The Sand:

http://www.metrolyrics.com/footprints-in-the-sand-lyrics-leona-lewis.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvizQnQN-vg 

Link to IPIC:  There are only two IPICs in Texas:

http://www.ipictheaters.com/ipic-locations.aspx

Baby, I was born this way

Recently, my husband asked me, "When are you going to stop getting involved in other people's business?"  To my own amazement, I immediately responded - NEVER.  The Reverend Al Sharpton was recently honored on the BET AWARDS for his humanitarian efforts.  Upon accepting his award, he stated, "Every night I go to sleep, I have one thing in mind,” he pledged to the crowd. “When I wake up the next morning, and my feet hit the ground, I want every bigot, every unjust person in the world to say, ‘Damn, he’s up again."  By no expansion of the imagination am I remotely an Al Sharpton, but I do understand his plight.  Even as a kid, you could find me defending someone I felt had been wronged.  There were times when I got my butt whipped, cursed, threatened and casted out.  Approaching the age of 50, I'm unchanged in that regard. Imperfect in many ways, there are a few things that are concrete about me.  I will share a few.  First, 99.9% of the time, I am invited into other's business.  Second, I will always stand up for what I believe to be right. Third, I have lighting bolt anger (zero to a 100 under a second).  I'm told that I inherited my temper from my father (blame him).  Fourth, I will always be apologetic when I am wrong. Last, it's extremely difficult to bullshit me (come correct or don't come at all). 

I imagine that at some moment in one's life, one find they wonder how they will be remembered when they have passed on.  Oftentimes, funerals avail one to expound on the life of the deceased.  Fortunately or unfortunately, no will be given that opportunity when I have passed on.  There will be no funeral.  For me, everyday that I'm alive, one can decide how they will treat me and honor me.  When I ceased to exist on this earth, love ones and enemies alike will certainly continue what they had always been doing.  If wonderful accolades were going out, they will continue.  Reversely if hatred, jealously, and back biting were distributed, it will continue. 

What I know for sure, everybody talk about everyone at some instances in their lives.  I accept that negatively is voiced by both friend and foe.  I am no exception - both have the capacity to get on my last damn nerves.  Therefore, I will continue to stand up for what I believe to be right; regardless the consequences. My butt, my heart and soul are prepared for the butt whippings, curses and cast aways.  It is my belief that I was simply born this way.

Final Destination

The absolute most wonderful thing about being amongst the living is that you get another chance to get it RIGHT.  Life's unexpected dynamics have the potential to circumvent this potentially good deed.  In other words, you never know when one will breathed their last breath. Age has taught me that you funeralize someone every time you encounter them, life may render future opportunities void. 

My mother spent several years in the nursing home before her passing.  The inevitability that she would die there was always with me.  I accepted that she would never return to her glorious self.  During her years at the nursing home, I mourned her transition.  I had the opportunity to say my goodbyes, cuddle in bed beside her frail body, hug and kiss her and whisper "I LOVE YOU', repeatedly.  This was the last time I would see her alive and I knew it would be.  Oh! What I would give to whisper I love you to her just one more time.  

I was lucky, many are not.  Too often, loves ones are plucked from us in an instance.  Another wonderful thing about aging is that you are well aware that the sunlight may never dust your face again.  Life is too short and too precious to be spent unforgiving, unyielding, uncompromising and un-everything.  

I have learned that most things that we get heated about really aren't that important.  We are mere mortals and guaranteed to screw a few things up along life's journey. And, if your have lived for any length of time, you have probably felt that "No good deed goes unpunished". 

The phrase 'No good deed goes unpunished' is a sardonic commentary on the frequency with which acts of kindness backfire on those who offer them. In other words, because life is inherently unfair, those who help others are doomed to suffer as a result of their being helpful.

Many of us have experienced this feeling and resolved to never position ourselves to feel it again.  For most of us, it's just a passing thought and we're right back issuing out those good deeds.  I have said many times that I have gotten it WRONG.  I have been wrong and have been wronged.  I accept it as the cost of being human. Life is the great teacher.  If you are wondering who has your back, the answer is often just a screw up away- only the strong survive.  When it comes right down to it, you don't choose your family.  It is my belief that your family is whoever has your back, tell you when you’re wrong and tell you when you're right. Only someone who does not care about you will sit on the sidelines and remain mute. Oftentimes, caring is  the willingness to take a punch, even if it seemingly appears that you've lost.  Sometimes, losing really is winning. The truth can, shall and will set you free. 

It is my hope that we all take a moment and remember that love covers a multitude of sins.  Know that the unknown always lurks in the background.  And, you may not be afforded the opportunity to RIGHT a WRONG.  Do not wallow in anger; final destinations are ALWAYS in play - there are no TOMORROWS promised.

My favorite Michael Jackson's song, "Man In The Mirror"is worth repeating:

 "Man In The Mirror"

I'm Gonna Make A Change,
For Once In My Life
It's Gonna Feel Real Good,
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .

As I, Turn Up The Collar On My
Favourite Winter Coat
This Wind Is Blowin' My Mind
I See The Kids In The Street,
With Not Enough To Eat
Who Am I, To Be Blind?
Pretending Not To See
Their Needs
A Summer's Disregard,
A Broken Bottle Top
And A One Man's Soul
They Follow Each Other On
The Wind Ya' Know
'Cause They Got Nowhere
To Go
That's Why I Want You To
Know

I'm Starting With The Man In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Him To Change
His Ways
And No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change)
(Na Na Na, Na Na Na, Na Na,
Na Nah)

I've Been A Victim Of A Selfish
Kind Of Love
It's Time That I Realize
That There Are Some With No
Home, Not A Nickel To Loan
Could It Be Really Me,
Pretending That They're Not
Alone?

A Willow Deeply Scarred,
Somebody's Broken Heart
And A Washed-Out Dream
(Washed-Out Dream)
They Follow The Pattern Of
The Wind, Ya' See
Cause They Got No Place
To Be
That's Why I'm Starting With
Me
(Starting With Me!)

I'm Starting With The Man In
The Mirror
(Ooh!)
I'm Asking Him To Change
His Ways
(Ooh!)
And No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change)

I'm Starting With The Man In
The Mirror
(Ooh!)
I'm Asking Him To Change His
Ways
(Change His Ways-Ooh!)
And No Message Could've
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make That . . .
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make That . . .)
Change!

I'm Starting With The Man In
The Mirror,
(Man In The Mirror-Oh
Yeah!)
I'm Asking Him To Change
His Ways
(Better Change!)
No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make The Change)
(You Gotta Get It Right, While
You Got The Time)
('Cause When You Close Your
Heart)
You Can't Close Your . . .Your
Mind!
(Then You Close Your . . .
Mind!)
That Man, That Man, That
Man, That Man
With That Man In The Mirror
(Man In The Mirror, Oh Yeah!)
That Man, That Man, That Man
I'm Asking Him To Change
His Ways
(Better Change!)
You Know . . .That Man
No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change)
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
Na Na Na, Na Na Na, Na Na,
Na Nah
(Oh Yeah!)
Gonna Feel Real Good Now!
Yeah Yeah! Yeah Yeah!
Yeah Yeah!
Na Na Na, Na Na Na, Na Na,
Na Nah
(Ooooh . . .)
Oh No, No No . . .
I'm Gonna Make A Change
It's Gonna Feel Real Good!
Come On!
(Change . . .)
Just Lift Yourself
You Know
You've Got To Stop It.
Yourself!
(Yeah!-Make That Change!)
I've Got To Make That Change,
Today!
Hoo!
(Man In The Mirror)
You Got To
You Got To Not Let Yourself . . .
Brother . . .
Hoo!
(Yeah!-Make That Change!)
You Know-I've Got To Get
That Man, That Man . . .
(Man In The Mirror)
You've Got To
You've Got To Move! Come
On! Come On!
You Got To . . .
Stand Up! Stand Up!
Stand Up!
(Yeah-Make That Change)
Stand Up And Lift
Yourself, Now!
(Man In The Mirror)
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
Aaow!
(Yeah-Make That Change)
Gonna Make That Change . . .
Come On!
(Man In The Mirror)
You Know It!
You Know It!
You Know It!
You Know . . .
(Change . . .)
Make That Change.

Making a splash!

Here's to family and friends kicking off the summer in spectacular fashion.  It's nothing quite like food, music, margaritas and a whole lot o f silly to make for a celebration.

Go ahead, take a peak: