Go ahead, take a peak:
Monday, June 25, 2012
Making a splash!
Here's to family and friends kicking off the summer in spectacular fashion. It's nothing quite like food, music, margaritas and a whole lot o f silly to make for a celebration.
Go ahead, take a peak:
Go ahead, take a peak:
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
No apology -No regrets!
You
don't remember what? I recently had the pleasure of chatting it up with an
85-year-old lady. How the time passes was the initiator of the
conversation. She went on to state that she has no idea the number of
times that she's been married. My first husband, another lady that he
subsequently married, and I, all attended the same church, she stated.
At his funeral, the lady said to me, "I want to apologize to you for
taking your husband." I told her, "You don't owe me an apology,
you didn't take him away for me - he just did what he wanted to do."
And, I remember my last husband, she stated. She went on to say, "But
that was me, I just got tired of his ass." Finally, she stated, " I don't
even remember the others.'' I asked if she had any regrets - she said, " I wouldn't change a thing". For me, this was profound. I'm thinking
she could educate us all.
If
I'm so lucky as to have my past beckon me at 85, no matter how the pendulum
swings, I hope that I, too, can utter No Regrets!
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Coming Full Circle
There
are countless numbers of definitions of a father. And, on this Father's
Day, It caused me to take pause to consider my definition. For me, like
so many others, my life doesn't fit into the traditional family
roles. My grandparents (paternal) adopted me from the age of six
months. I've always known my biological father. He lived in Chicago
and my grandparents raised me in Mississippi. Oh, there are the all-varying
reasons why I landed in the loving hands of my grandparents. Funny thing,
it didn't even seriously dawn on me until my twenties that I didn't grow up
with either biological parent. I don't know the reason it began to
trouble me in my twenties. Perhaps, it was becoming a parent
myself. But time is indeed the great healer. Today on this Father's
Day, I've come full circle. This year, my father and stepmother came to visit
me for the first time. I spent the night at my father's house in
Mississippi for the very first time this year. Two small things that I wasn't confident would have ever happened. It was truly one of my life's highlight to have my father and stepmother visit my home. And, it was
equally delightful to witness the sheer emotion on my father's face to have my
husband and me sleep over at his home. My father and I have forged a new
beginning and I hope for many years to grow in this father/daughter relationship.
There
is nothing that I would change about my wonderful childhood. I have fond memories of my paternal grandfather during my early
years; until the boys came along. Afterwards, let's just say he ruled
with an iron clad fist. Oh, but there was a savior not too far in the
distance, Uncle Lavern. Uncle Lavern was like a big brother and
father all rolled into one. Reminiscing of years past, I had an Ah Ha moment. I
realized that an enormous part of my life would be rendered void had it not
been for Uncle Lavern.
What
I know for sure is that when you are kid, you don't know that difference
between an uncle, brother or father. You just want someone to love
you. And on this Father's Day, I'm happy that I had Uncle Lavern to love
me.
I
hope that you have taken the time to wish Happy Father's Day to all the men in
your life.
Monday, June 11, 2012
Vacancy
"my job sucks, my health sucks, my dogs suck, my house sucks, my everything sucks"
Oh yes! Debbie Downer is a name of a fictional Saturday Night Live character which debuted in 2004. The character's name is a slang phrase which refers to someone who frequently adds bad news and negative feelings to a gathering, thus bringing down the mood of everyone around them.
Oh yes! Debbie Downer is a name of a fictional Saturday Night Live character which debuted in 2004. The character's name is a slang phrase which refers to someone who frequently adds bad news and negative feelings to a gathering, thus bringing down the mood of everyone around them.
I
venture to say that we all have one in our circle of friends. Friends who
literally suck the life out of you; often time slowly, but nevertheless
rendering you breathless. It's exhausting as a friend and life is too
short for toxic people. I have discovered that the older I get, the less
patience I have for these energy drainers. Many experts suggest that an
occasional inventory be taken to access friendship to determine whether the
friendship is adding more worth; oppose to discomfort. Personally, I prefer
to make life changes at New Years. It's something about the onset of the
New Year that inspires change. It is my belief that too much of the Debbie Downer can actually be a health
hazard. At the very least, it doesn't add to life's sizzle. And frankly
my dear, I'm mostly about the sizzle at this point in my life. Come New Year's 2013, there may be a vacancy.
Take
a little time and access your friendships, it just may save YOUR life.
Monday, May 21, 2012
Kiss of a Rose
Many of us recently celebrated Mother's Day and paid tribute to the unique one who gave us life, unconditional love, and/or an abundance of wisdom.
Through the years:
If her rose is still in bloom, pepper her with kisses all the day long. If your flower is still in bloom, shower her with love all her days long. Bask in the awesomeness of her beauty. When her bloom has withered, cherish the fragrance in your heart all your days long.
I have been fortunate enough to have many mothers in my life, but my beloved is here no more. There isn't a day that passes that I don't think of her. She was a hell of a lady and could raise as much hell. She is missed.
There is song by Jennifer Hudson that makes me cry. It's makes me think of her.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8acG_nyH7_o
Still Here
You looked at me and saw what I never could see
You made me be more than I thought I could ever be
And when I needed a friend you were always there to lift me up to make me strong
You're not gone your still here
With me all the time
You're still here
When I close my eyes
I still see you
I still feel you
And we'll never be apart
You're still here
Still here in my heart
In my heart
It's because of you I knew how it felt to be loved, Oh?
You made me feel beautiful cause you believed I was
And I will never forget how you touched my life
You made me feel like I belonged
You'll live on
You're still here
With me all the time
You're still here
When I close my eyes
I still see you
I still feel you
And we'll never be apart
You're still here
Still here in my heart
Oh?
You're my life
You'll be in my life
You'll be part of me
I'll just think of you and you'll be?
Still here
With me all the time, Oh Lord
Still here
When I close my eyes
I feel you
And we'll never never be apart
You're still here
Still here in my heart
In my heart
Through the years:
If her rose is still in bloom, pepper her with kisses all the day long. If your flower is still in bloom, shower her with love all her days long. Bask in the awesomeness of her beauty. When her bloom has withered, cherish the fragrance in your heart all your days long.
I have been fortunate enough to have many mothers in my life, but my beloved is here no more. There isn't a day that passes that I don't think of her. She was a hell of a lady and could raise as much hell. She is missed.
There is song by Jennifer Hudson that makes me cry. It's makes me think of her.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8acG_nyH7_o
Still Here
You looked at me and saw what I never could see
You made me be more than I thought I could ever be
And when I needed a friend you were always there to lift me up to make me strong
You're not gone your still here
With me all the time
You're still here
When I close my eyes
I still see you
I still feel you
And we'll never be apart
You're still here
Still here in my heart
In my heart
It's because of you I knew how it felt to be loved, Oh?
You made me feel beautiful cause you believed I was
And I will never forget how you touched my life
You made me feel like I belonged
You'll live on
You're still here
With me all the time
You're still here
When I close my eyes
I still see you
I still feel you
And we'll never be apart
You're still here
Still here in my heart
Oh?
You're my life
You'll be in my life
You'll be part of me
I'll just think of you and you'll be?
Still here
With me all the time, Oh Lord
Still here
When I close my eyes
I feel you
And we'll never never be apart
You're still here
Still here in my heart
In my heart
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Love Don't Live Here Anymore
"I
have learned to get up from the table when love is no longer being
served."
Why
is this such a simple thing do, but yet so crushingly devastating for most of
us to do? Many cling on for dear life to a love that has long passed us
by. Days are gone when your smile catches my presence. The music
has stopped and the dance is over. We know we must enter the night
because daylight is no more. Let's crusade forward to a love just over
the horizons. Loose the shackles of fear and don't dare look back for
true love awaits you on the other side.
Thanks
to my cousin Angelia for this quote. It is my hope that someone presses through
their fear and sit down at a table where love is abundant.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
To Love Somebody
There are certain moments in life that simply take your breath away. I have been swept away, blown away and completely mesmerized by a performance. I must have rewind and played this incredible performance at least 10 times. A true majestic moment. I had to stop in my tracks, take pause and engulf myself in this amazing talent. If you have ever loved or been loved, you will get on feet and triumph in this unbelievable performance.
To Love Somebody by Joshua Ledet:
http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_11/performances/joshua_ledet_to_love_somebody/
To Love Somebody by Joshua Ledet:
http://www.americanidol.com/videos/season_11/performances/joshua_ledet_to_love_somebody/
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Ooops! I Did It Again
The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”
― Maya Angelou
― Maya Angelou
Oprah stated that this is one of her favorite quotes by her
mentor. My interpretation, "When someone is an asshole the first time, an
asshole is what they are." I was recently speaking with a girlfriend
concerning "boy"
problems. In short, she discovered that he had been dishonest and was
weighing the direction of the relationship. My advice is that we are all
human beings, flawed, and will make mistakes. The question is how
egregious the offense was to the offendee. We all have our
threshold of tolerance; therefore, we have to set our own boundaries.
But, my question is, why are we so damn mad when, Ooops, I did it again?
Sunday, April 22, 2012
It's Your Thing
With 50 just over the horizons, I find
myself not dreading it entirely; due in part to witnessing a couple of fabulous
ladies reach this milestone. They sure make 50 look dynamic. However, this doesn't mean that getting
older is swell. It certainly comes with its wonders. I'm already
considering investing in adult diapers. Just recently, I saw a commercial with
celebrity Lisa Rinna endorsing Depends.
I'm thinking around 45, gravity is ferocious. Every body part
starts to go south. Breasts are lying in your lap and your butt is
dragging the damn floor. To try and combat this downward spiral, I call
it working up; instead of working
out. There is a need for everything to stand up. This weekend, husband and I attended my sorority
sister's Fierce, Fabulous and Fifty
celebration. What I most admired is that she did it her way. There were
enlarged photographs that chronicled her life. Songs were played that she
boogied to from early teens to current. She and her diva girlfriends
entertained us with a choreographed danced rendition. Her favorite artist
mesmerized us with a full concert. Yes, the incomparable Michael Jackson
impressionist Billy Jeaned and Thrilled us. The beautiful Karen
Dunlap welcomed a tender toss from her husband. Her radiant smile stamped the night, Celebrating the Life of Karen Dunlap was indeed done her way.
I'm starting to feel Sexy 50 bubbling up around me.
I'm starting to feel Sexy 50 bubbling up around me.
The Fierce, Fabulous and Fifty Karen
Friday, April 13, 2012
Ménage 'a Trois
I'm the type of girl who doesn't shy away from a
challenge. This past weekend, my dear husband propositioned me to
participate in a threesome. He
articulated the details of the arrangement and promised a ride on the wild
side. He provided detail description of her beauty, charisma, and sex
appeal. Let me warn that it is imperative that the 'third wheel' is a beauty. However, it is just as imperative
that she isn't as beautiful as you
are. He delicately pointed out that she is a showstopper when her top is down. After hearing all arguments in favor of this threesome, I agreed to give this black beauty a test drive. Easter weekend, we set out on this
exploration and the results are phenomenal. The attention garnered was fascinating;
captivating all that witness. I was delightfully intrigued and
overwhelmed by the magnitude of onlookers. In short, this experience was worth the ride and worth repeating. I literally had to hold on to my hat. Included are a few photographs for your viewing
pleasure. Don't be jealous - you too can enjoy an Ménage 'a Trois.
Black Beauty:
Black Beauty:
Friday, April 6, 2012
Sex from the Pulpit
Good
intention/Good idea or Good intention/Bad idea, you decide:
A southwest Florida church issued a challenge for its
married members: Hanky-panky every day. Relevant Church head pastor Paul Wirth
says the 50 percent divorce rate was the catalyst for The 30-Day Sex
Challenge."And that's no different for people who attend church," Wirth
said. "Sometimes life gets in the way. Our jobs get in the way."
Initially, I thought this pastor must be nuts. No
actually, I said this man is out of his damn mind. I imagined he and his
male comrades sitting around conjuring up ways to encourage and entice the
women of their congregation to satisfy their overwhelming sexual
appetite. Obviously, the pastor didn't consult his wife or any other
female for that matter, prior to the issuance of the 30-Day Sex Challenge.
If the good pastor had the foresight to have done so, he would have known that Mother Nature pays most women a visit
within those 30 days. Normally, I’m more of an optimist (the glass is half
full type of girl). Concerning this challenge, I had to pull myself out
of the gutter of pessimism. I venture to say that most women enjoy a
healthy sex life, but a male had to be behind the brains of this 30-Day Sex
Challenge. One of my biggest critiques is the mechanics of the
challenge wasn't spelled out. How was this actually supposed
to transpire? What are the rules of engagement? Should the
wives have a 30- day supply of lingerie and high heels for the daily
performance? Will there be adequate foreplay or the old faithful roll over and
assume she's ready? Will the husbands help with the chores and the
children to help alleviate the wife's fatigue? Was romance involved? And
if so, were both the initiator? I begin in the gutter of pessimism on this idea
and unfortunately I ended there. My advice to the pastor, next time,
consult with a woman.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23227651/ns/us_news-weird_news/t/love-god-get-it/#.T38QUY7BHXU
http://www.cbsnews.com/2100-502003_162-3850842.html
http://www.internetmonk.com/archive/dear-ed-young-jr
http://www.cbsnews.com/2100-502003_162-3850842.html
http://www.internetmonk.com/archive/dear-ed-young-jr
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Subscription to the Amen Corner
I ask the question, why are many of us vexed when others are
in disagreement. Rationally, the realization that we are all unique should be
at the forefront of varying opinions. Irrationally, we crave others to be
in lock step with our every viewpoint; exclusively seeking out individuals whose views and opinion are duplicates of our own. Many of us forfeit otherwise fulfilling friendships due to opposing views. I tag this as subscribing to the Amen corner. Albeit, it offers you the warm and fuzzy of the all familiar. It does not open you up to new challenges. I
affirm that if you aren't occasionally stirring up controversy, you probably
aren’t talking about very much. Welcoming the astute oppositions, I strive
on passionate debates and dialogue. Differing of views and opinions has the capacity to enlighten and broaden our
horizons. Varying opinions lend itself to healthy dialogue,
which subsequently offers an opportunity to gain invaluable knowledge and
insight. I challenge you to cancel your subscription to the Amen Corner and open yourself up to new
challenges.
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Yin and Yang
I recently read an article that referenced the importance of yin and yang in one's life. I researched and found the following:
The ancient Chinese subscribe to a concept called Yin Yang which is a belief that there exist two complementary forces in the universe. One is Yang which represents everything positive or masculine and the other is Yin which is characterized as negative or feminine. One is not better than the other. Instead they are both necessary and a balance of both is highly desirable.
This thinking is different from the duality of most religion where one state overcomes the other e.g. good over evil. In the concept of Yin Yang, too much of either one is bad. The ideal is a balance of both. The hot Saharan desert for example is an example of extreme Yang while the bitter cold Antarctica is extreme Yin. Neither is desirable.
I comprised a few examples of how Yin and Yang balance in a friendship as follows:
1. The guy you recently went out on a date with haven't contacted you because he probably lost your telephone number, email, Facebook, Twitter, etc. (yang). The guy hasn't called you back because he's just not that in to you (yin).
2. Your husband is abusive because he is overwhelmed and stressed at work (yang). Your husband is a jackass and you best drop him like a hot potato (yin).
3. Your spouse continuously cheats on you because he/she has a lot on his/her plate and stressed, but he/she still loves you (yang). Your spouse is cheating on you because he/she is not in love with you anymore and he/she will cheat on you for as long as you are married (yin).
4. Yes, you gained a few pounds but your clothes still look good on you (yang). If you don't stop eating and workout, your ass is going to get big as a house (yin).
5. Your best friend keeps being critical of you because she doesn't realize how it hurts you (yang). Your girlfriend is jealous and not really your friend (yin).
I agree that too much of either is bad. In my opinion, Yin Yang is an interesting concept worth exploration.
Information on Yin Yang and Feng Shui:
http://www.absolutelyfengshui.com/fengshui/feng-shui-yin-yang.php
http://fengshui.about.com/od/thebasics/qt/fengshui.htm
The ancient Chinese subscribe to a concept called Yin Yang which is a belief that there exist two complementary forces in the universe. One is Yang which represents everything positive or masculine and the other is Yin which is characterized as negative or feminine. One is not better than the other. Instead they are both necessary and a balance of both is highly desirable.
This thinking is different from the duality of most religion where one state overcomes the other e.g. good over evil. In the concept of Yin Yang, too much of either one is bad. The ideal is a balance of both. The hot Saharan desert for example is an example of extreme Yang while the bitter cold Antarctica is extreme Yin. Neither is desirable.
I comprised a few examples of how Yin and Yang balance in a friendship as follows:
1. The guy you recently went out on a date with haven't contacted you because he probably lost your telephone number, email, Facebook, Twitter, etc. (yang). The guy hasn't called you back because he's just not that in to you (yin).
2. Your husband is abusive because he is overwhelmed and stressed at work (yang). Your husband is a jackass and you best drop him like a hot potato (yin).
3. Your spouse continuously cheats on you because he/she has a lot on his/her plate and stressed, but he/she still loves you (yang). Your spouse is cheating on you because he/she is not in love with you anymore and he/she will cheat on you for as long as you are married (yin).
4. Yes, you gained a few pounds but your clothes still look good on you (yang). If you don't stop eating and workout, your ass is going to get big as a house (yin).
5. Your best friend keeps being critical of you because she doesn't realize how it hurts you (yang). Your girlfriend is jealous and not really your friend (yin).
I agree that too much of either is bad. In my opinion, Yin Yang is an interesting concept worth exploration.
Information on Yin Yang and Feng Shui:
http://www.absolutelyfengshui.com/fengshui/feng-shui-yin-yang.php
http://fengshui.about.com/od/thebasics/qt/fengshui.htm
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Catch A Fire!
This past weekend I participated in my sorority's Alpha Kappa Alpha
Sorority, Inc. Regional Conference in Houston, TX. In the midst of a sea of pink and
green were beautiful dedicated women who work tirelessly to service all
mankind. Globally, my very own chapter made hundreds of dresses for
girls in Africa as a part of our global poverty initiative. In what was
appropriately title, 'Little Dresses 4 Africa' begin at the
chapter level but quickly caught the attention and enthusiasm of many
others (schools, churches, Girl Scouts, other organizations, etc.). The dresses were
made out of pillow cases and will undoubtedly be the only dress for many
little girls in Africa. This initiative caught fire and
skyrocketed to include underpants and little purses. The limitless
goals that can be conquered if we rally together to promote positive
change. Locally, it reminded me of the Trayvon Martin (17 year old who
was shot by a self appointed neighborhood security guard) case. Had it
not been for the world's demand for justice, the case most likely would
have never been investigated. President Obama stated that if he had a
son he would look like Trayvon. Regardless the resolution, this case demanded an investigation. We should all be reminded that if we
stand together some of the world's most pressing
injustices can be extinguished. Amazing things have and can happen when we 'Catch A Fire'! Start one today.
Little Dress 4 Africa display at Regional Conference:
Sorority sisters at Regional Conference:
A close friend asked that I include this in this posting:
Link to Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Alpha-Xi-Omega-Chapter-of-Alpha-Kappa-Alpha-Sorority-Inc/159929277371270
Link to Little Dresses for Africa:
http://www.littledressesforafrica.org/blog/
Little Dress 4 Africa display at Regional Conference:
Sorority sisters at Regional Conference:
A close friend asked that I include this in this posting:
Whether we want to admit it or
not, Trayvon Martin could have been my son or your son. His killing is a painful reminder that
life, as an African American male, is still seen as a stereotype and profiled
as a threat to this society. This
has lead to a beautiful, innocent child being murdered. This case has captured the attention of
so many people mainly because of the injustice of it all, but also because
Black media drove this story and forced mainstream media to also report on
it. It has galvanized African
Americans to pull together and demand justice like I have never witnessed
before. While it is important to
continue to rally and demand justice for the killing of Trayvon, let’s also remember
to pray for his family and friends as they go through the grieving process. My heart bleeds for this family. Yet, I am painfully reminded that…but
for the grace of God…
R. Golden
Link to Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. on Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Alpha-Xi-Omega-Chapter-of-Alpha-Kappa-Alpha-Sorority-Inc/159929277371270
Link to Little Dresses for Africa:
http://www.littledressesforafrica.org/blog/
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Fierce, Fabulous, and ...
I am certain that confidence, allied with intelligence, is
the most superb sex appeal. Fierce, Fabulous, and Fifty, I recently
received an invitation from a friend who is ecstatic about celebrating her
upcoming milestone. The invitation read, Fierce, Fabulous and
Fifty. My first thought was 'Wow', a girl after my own heart. My
second thought was, now, I'm going to have to come up with a different catchy phrase
in a couple of years. I am a fan of women who are happy in their own skin,
loving themselves for who they wonderfully are. I recently celebrated
this milestone with another friend. She does not disappoint - ferociously
sexy up fifty. I presented her with a bottle of the most delicious
sweet red wines I've tasted and a hoola-hoop. It is my opinion that a
bottle of terrific wine and a hoola-hoop will either keep you sexy or bring your sexy back. A combination of the adult wine and the kid in you
is guaranteed to stir up youthfulness. No matter your age, celebrate your magnificance daily by honoring your true beautiful self. Baby, I was Born This Way - thanks Lady Gaga.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
I'll Always Love You!
We all know the iconic song Whitney Houston made famous in
the movie 'The Body Guard'. It's about loving someone enough to allow them to
exit your life; because to do otherwise would cause both of you great
pain. The legendary country superstar Dolly Parton wrote this song when
it was evident she needed to part ways with her long time business
partner. In short, it's wasn't working anymore. I was reminded how
we desperately hold on to things and loved ones when we know the
expiration date has come and often time past. Fear is the culprit.
Many of us have the paralyzing fear of hurting the other person, fear of retaliation,
fear of being alone, fear of what others will say, fear of everything - pick
one. At the beginning of this year, I was at a crossroad and I stated to
my husband that I wouldn't be surprised if I had one friend left by year's
end. I didn't have any profound reason for making the statement.
But somehow, I knew I would be different this year - not things would be
different but I would be different. On the subconscious, I knew I had
been a fake; not fully embracing and living my authentic life. I
could feel a change coming in my bones. I have certainly been guilty of
doing and being what others were more comfortable with. It's a
sacrifice I'm no longer willing to make. The cost of losing myself is too
great. I have amazing family and friends who I'm honored to have in my
life. I would love nothing more than for all of us to remain wonderful
assets in each other’s lives forever. However, I fully understand the
lyrics to that famous song, I'll Always
Love You and I cautiously vow to embrace it; as not to allow fear to
destroy or hinder my progress and the progress of the ones I hold dearly.
Sometimes, we really are NOT what
each other need, but the love shared always remains; no matter the separation.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Caution to the wind
“20 years from now you will be disappointed by the things you didn’t do
than by the one’s you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the
safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream.
Discover” ~ Mark Twain
If you've been reading my posts, you know that I'm striving to live an authentic life. Reality check! It's not an easy undertaking. I've discovered that it is a constant pursuit that requires always being present. I once had a discussion with a friend concerning the authenticity of a decision that was being anticipated. The friend insisted that time will reveal. I often thought about that, 'time will reveal'. I don't think that I agree. However, there is some validity. I'm certain that it's not the fearless thing to do - wait on time. However, it certainly will reveal one's tenacity or weakness; and the consequences thereafter. I believe that waiting on time is at a minimal; cowardice. Courageousness boosts your chances to live your best life. It's the difference between ordinary and extraordinary. I've often heard the saying, "My heart don't beat on fear". Disappointingly, it's often just that - a saying; which is why I was enticed by the above quote because too often many of us choose not to be true to ourselves; but rather allow the voices of others drown out our own inner voice. It is our challenge to make our life a masterpiece. 20 years from now, will you be disappointed by the things you didn't do? Why not start building that masterpiece today?
If you've been reading my posts, you know that I'm striving to live an authentic life. Reality check! It's not an easy undertaking. I've discovered that it is a constant pursuit that requires always being present. I once had a discussion with a friend concerning the authenticity of a decision that was being anticipated. The friend insisted that time will reveal. I often thought about that, 'time will reveal'. I don't think that I agree. However, there is some validity. I'm certain that it's not the fearless thing to do - wait on time. However, it certainly will reveal one's tenacity or weakness; and the consequences thereafter. I believe that waiting on time is at a minimal; cowardice. Courageousness boosts your chances to live your best life. It's the difference between ordinary and extraordinary. I've often heard the saying, "My heart don't beat on fear". Disappointingly, it's often just that - a saying; which is why I was enticed by the above quote because too often many of us choose not to be true to ourselves; but rather allow the voices of others drown out our own inner voice. It is our challenge to make our life a masterpiece. 20 years from now, will you be disappointed by the things you didn't do? Why not start building that masterpiece today?
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Who's your daddy?
Crack,
cocaine, prescription drugs, sex, food, jealously, envy, religion, fear, what
master are you bowing down to? Oh you guilty pleasures, why do you
deceive? Release me from your grips of destruction. Free me
from this bondage of self-hatred. Is your drug of choice preventing you from liberation? Are you doing the
same thing over and over, but expecting a different result? It's time to try
something new. What I know for sure is if you don't acknowledge your
problems and deal with them head on, your drug
will consume you; thus preventing you from living an authentic life. If you are not being true to yourself, a little part of YOU die
each day. You'll see your reflection in the mirror one day and not
recognize yourself. There are millions of drugs used to self- medicate, hinder, bind us in fear and keep us
shackled in mediocrity at best. Prescription drugs, food, sex and religion can
be wonderful gifts if used to enlighten and enrich our lives. Conversely,
these gifts can be our stumbling blocks if used as a crutch or excuse to not
take action in our lives. It's time to stop sabotaging our lives and take steps
towards creating our best life. Do you realize that we create our own
lives? Yes, we are indeed control of the overwhelming decisions we make
in our own lives. There are very few decisions out of our own
control. Which means, there are few excuses preventing us from living the lives that
we desire. We have the freedom to make our own choices. STOP; ask
yourself who is preventing you from living your authentic life. I vow to strive
each day to create the life that I desire by making choices to enhance my
life and the others around me to affect positive change. Your daddy won't fix what's ailing you. You
ARE what you have been waiting on!
** Remember that you are who you are and that is good enough. Everyone is supposed to be
different; it's what makes you special. There's no one in the world who is
exactly like you and that makes you unique and amazing.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Noose around your neck
Today, I was reminded we as mere mortals are capable of
many misdeeds. Consciously or unconsciously, we're sometimes the offenders; and others the recipients. The question is, are we
capable of forgiving the offender? Or, how long will that noose of
unforgivingness adorn our necks? I've always considered myself a
forgiving soul. However, there is a BUT. I have discovered in recent
years that I can be relentless in
having my say when I believe there
has been an injustice. In addition, I have been accused of being brutally
honest. I didn't recognize this in my earlier years. Therefore,
I've done some self-assessment, and I charge each of you to conduct your own
self-assessment. In addition to looking inwardly, I challenged myself to
take 'The Narcissistic-Personality-inventory Test', and through my husband's urging I
took a glance at my astrological sign. Well, well, well, to my surprise; initially, the results didn't look too pretty (as a disclaimer
I'm not 100% sold on either the test or the astrological review).
Admittedly, there are some recognizable nuggets of truth in both. What I do know for
sure is that I'm a work in progress. Sometimes, I'm an excellent steward of
forgiveness and quite often I fall short. But what I do know for sure is
"To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love, you will receive
untold peace and happiness" - author
unknown. Most importantly, the person we are not forgiving is really
ourselves. Gheez, that noose can get pretty darn tight. I concur
that an exercise in forgiveness is good for our souls and our necks.
Forgive someone today, it just may be yourself.
Just for fun:
http://www.oprah.com/relationships/The-Narcissistic-Personality-Inventory-Test
http://www.psychicguild.com/horoscopes_explained.php
Saturday, March 3, 2012
What's on your tombstone
With the recent passing of the 'Voice' Whitney Houston (my favorite artist), it
awakened in me a since of my own mortality. With 2012 approaching, a
conversation spun with a friend regarding our 'Bucklist Manifesto'. We agreed to give serious thought about
our life's goals in the month of
January; and make a compilation of at least ten things to accomplish in
2012. Admittedly, I'm still in the process of completing the ten-item
manifesto; I have made tremendous progress and anxiously awaiting to experience
some desires of my heart. Reflecting over the past couple of years, I
smile to myself because in spite of life's rocky roads; I have experience many,
many extraordinary moments of joy and happiness. As time waits on no man,
I am more encouraged to strive for ultimate jubilation in breathtaking moments
shared with love ones. When the curtains have closed, I want my tombstone
to read 'I Danced'. One of my
favorite songs is 'I Hope You Dance'-
I have it framed hanging on my home-office wall. The lyrics are:
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin'
Lovin' might be a mistake, but it's worth makin'
Don't let some Hellbent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to sellin' out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along)
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
(Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder, where those years have gone?)
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
Dance
**Compilation of a few joyous moments over the past couple of years:
President Barack Obama's Inauguration
Celebrating a past Xmas at City Place, Dallas
Celebrating birthday at Oceanaire, Dallas Galleria
Celebrating 10th anniversary at Five Sixty, Dallas by Wolf Gang Puck
A visit from college girlfriend Anita from Memphis, TN a couple years ago
Celebrating girlfriend's Valarie husband's birthday (loaded!)
Celebrating a past Xmas at my older house
Daruis and LaShundra's wedding rehearsal dinner at my older house
New York: I LOVE New York
New York at Forest Gump's restaurant
Celebrating a past Xmas at girlfriend Ruth's home
Celebrating my 46th birthday
New York to see the musical 'Memphis' with hubby
Welcoming the newest Hamberlin (maiden name) into the family (The beautiful Layla)
New York at wax museum
New York with girlfriends Ruth and Valarie (Everybody in the club getting Tipsy!)
Superbowl weekend in Dallas
New York to see musical (yes, I saw it twice - loved it twice)
AKAs and Kappa's Kasino Night
With girlfriend Velene at Babyface and Charlie Wilson's concert (Oh yeah! VIP)
Birthday celebration for girlfriend Valarie's husband
Darius and LaShundra's wedding reception at Sheraton - Dallas
Fayette, MS at Uncle Lavern's home with AKAs (sorors) and a Delta girl
(taken after the repast of Uncle Herman)
Gene's 45th birthday at Ms. Mary's
Xmas 2011 moment with my son
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